


okay

by miloron (ocoa)



Category: JBJ (Band), NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV)
Genre: Gen, Guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 07:44:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16132787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ocoa/pseuds/miloron
Summary: Jonghyun and Hyunbin have a talk





	okay

Jonghyun wakes up to the buzz of a number he hasn’t seen in his notifications for…a while, he regrets to say. Slipping on a sweater and a cap, he quickly replies the message before leaving the dorm. The walk to the park is familiar, even when he hadn’t gone that way for a long time. It’s ingrained into his footsteps. While it’s 2am, it’s not quite quiet, with a few straggling drunk businessmen and a few couples roam about. Still, when he gets to the park, it’s empty, save for one familiar figure. Jonghyun, despite the edges of sleep still niggling at his head, smiles.

“Hyunbin-ah,” he greets, and the model’s head whips up, immediately lighting up.

“Jonghyun-hyung.” His words slur together, not like he was drunk but maybe whining? “I missed you.”

Hyunbin lumbers over and hugs Jonghyun, who pats him in the back placatingly. It’s been at least a year since Produce 101 ended, but he knows Hyunbin’s signs, and all of them are pointing to sadness, a deep aching sadness that Jonghyun doesn’t know if he can fix. But Hyunbin did call him, of all people, so he guessed he would try his best.

Hyunbin finally lets him go and Jonghyun sits beside the boy, making casual talk while waiting for Hyunbin to broach the issue.

“How is Nu’est W?” he asks instead, and Jonghyun pursed his lips for a nanosecond before nodding.

“Good.” He says, and the smile he has is genuine, because it’s true. He’s reminded of the times his parents called and he lied through his teeth. It was better to lie than to tell them that they might have wasted their money letting him do _this_.

“That’s good,” Hyunbin replies, and Jonghyun waits in silence for five counts before Hyunbin shifts. “Do you think it’s my fault that JBJ disbanded?”

Jonghyun blinked.

“The only ones who have been really appearing are Kenta-hyung and Sanggyun-hyung, and even then, their name,” _JBJ95_ , Jonghyun remembers, “it shows how much they miss JBJ and because of me,” Hyunbin peters off, head hanging down. "I feel like I don't deserve to say anything to them." 

Jonghyun looked down at his fingers.

He doesn’t quite know how to answer the question, because in a whole lot of ways, he understands where Hyunbin is coming from.

He’s always blamed himself, no matter what Aron-hyung tells him, for how Nu’est had failed. And even now, if he was more determined maybe they could actually talk to Minhyun…

Hyunbin’s departure may have started the companies from drawing out of JBJ, but still…

“I don’t think it’s your fault.” He says, and Hyunbin laughs wetly. He’s crying, but Jonghyun doesn’t point it out.

“Everyone says that.”

“But it’s not your fault.” Jonghyun pressed. “I wouldn’t blame you for signing with YG, especially when you’re already under YGK+.” Hyunbin stayed silent, so Jonghyun continued. “Your feelings are valid, Hyunbin-ah. You aren’t at fault for this. The others will agree.”

Hyunbin sniffled, head still ducked down, shoulders shaking. 

“You can let yourself be sad.”

Hyunbin sobbed, and Jonghyun stays with him until the sun rises and Hyunbin’s tears stop.

“Sorry I couldn’t help with more, Hyunbin.” He says to the boy. Hyunbin suddenly looks all the 21 years he has lived, barely an adult but not quite a child. Jonghyun can’t help reaching out to pat the model’s hair down.

“It’s okay, hyung. Thank you. I just wanted someone to tell me that it was okay.”

Jonghyun smiled.

“It’s always okay to cry.”

Hyunbin gave a half-smile.

“Thanks hyung.”

**Author's Note:**

> > Follow me on twitter @kwaks43!


End file.
